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Old December 24th, 2020 #1
Crowe
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Default Guilty pleasures (chink food)

I don't regularly eat chink food, but occasionally, like once every couple of months I'll order some take out.

They got this little hole in the wall place I know of that's got the best chink food around here. It's been open for 25 years, in spite of economic fluctuations and that's because their food is good.

Anyway, they don't have fancy names for their dishes. On their menu, it's listed like beef with onions, beef with peppers, beef with tomatoes, etc. They got the best beef pepper steak. And I'll reluctantly admit that's beef with an asterisk. Still not 100% sure it's beef. But it's tender, and well seasoned, and it's fucking delicious. Even if somebody told me for a fact that this was canine or feline, I wouldn't care.

I've tried to replicate this in house with actual beef, but it's always off. I can make a stir fry that's pretty good, but not as good as what they make. And it costs me more money, on top of the time put into prep work/cooking/cleaning up the mess.

The stuff is probably loaded with MSG, and other stuff that's bad for you, but occasionally I cheat, I don't care.

They used to have a Korean BBQ place around here, that served asian fusion food, and they had this spicy beef (and I'm 100% sure it was legit beef). Little on the expensive side compared to the Chinese place, but it was worth it.

I like Mexican food as well, but I've had good success at replicating that in house, because the flavors aren't as complex as with the chink stuff. Stuff like fajitas, I just buy some flank steak and make that myself. And taco meat is super easy to make.
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Last edited by Crowe; December 24th, 2020 at 07:49 PM.
 
Old December 24th, 2020 #2
Larry the Raysiss
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Originally Posted by Crowe View Post
They got the best beef pepper steak. And I'll reluctantly admit that's beef with an asterisk. Still not 100% sure it's beef. But it's tender,
I have never tried it yet myself, but I have read and heard the reason why the beef and chicken in chink food is the consistency it is is because they soak it in a baking soda "marinade". Some sites will tell you that you can do the same thing with a milk marinade, but I did try that and it did absolutely nothing (soaked overnight).

And you're right about the cost. Unless you make the sauces from scratch (and even then I have doubts), it's expensive to buy that stuff and make it yourself, compared to the take-out places. Look at the prices for one small bottle of sweet and sour or some other asian sauce. Once won't even be enough for one recipe.
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Old December 25th, 2020 #3
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Originally Posted by Larry the Raysiss View Post
I have never tried it yet myself, but I have read and heard the reason why the beef and chicken in chink food is the consistency it is is because they soak it in a baking soda "marinade". Some sites will tell you that you can do the same thing with a milk marinade, but I did try that and it did absolutely nothing (soaked overnight).

And you're right about the cost. Unless you make the sauces from scratch (and even then I have doubts), it's expensive to buy that stuff and make it yourself, compared to the take-out places. Look at the prices for one small bottle of sweet and sour or some other asian sauce. Once won't even be enough for one recipe.
Trying to nail the flavor profiles, and the texture of the meat is tricky to get with the Asian food. I've tried a number of things as well, and haven't been successful. I even bought a wok, and some wok oil to cook the stuff. But those work better on gas stoves.

They got the kitchen in viewing distance as soon as you walk into the place. I can look behind the counter and see that the kitchen looks clean, and that they all wear masks, so from a culinary perspective, their operation looks professional, and not second rate, cutting corners. They got the gas turned up blasting on those woks too. Me not being able to get the texture and consistency right probably has something to do with me not being able to get as much heat onto a wok as they do. I will say that cooking on a wok is really convenient, you turn the heat all the way up, put a little oil in there, like if you want to sautee a whole bunch of vegetables at once, it's pretty efficient. The hotter you can get a burner, the more efficient the wok is.

They don't have one near me (or I'd be spending a lot more money on take out....), but Panda Express has really good food as well. Last time I ate at one was about a year ago, and Beijing Beef was pretty legit. I like the places that are open where you can look over the counter into the kitchen, and I could see that the kitchen was spotless. I'm kinda OCD when it comes to my kitchen, and cooking surfaces. It's one of the reasons why I really don't like cooking stuff very frequently that's going to make a huge mess. Dumb bitch I dated a few years back would pile up dishes in my sink, and that drove me up the fucking wall, I literally wanted to ring this cunt's neck out, and the dishwasher was empty too. She didn't last long.

Beijing Beef, this stuff is crazy good. It's breaded, kinda like a chicken fried steak, and smothered in a hot sauce.

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Last edited by Crowe; December 25th, 2020 at 04:07 PM.
 
Old December 25th, 2020 #4
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I even bought a wok, and some wok oil to cook the stuff. But those work better on gas stoves.

They got the gas turned up blasting on those woks too.
Yeah, that's another thing I've noticed. A lot of the dishes are basically more or less deep fried in a wok at these chink joints. It's not all full of oil like a deep fryer, it's full of sauce and that's how they cook a lot of the dishes in these places that I've seen. I call it "deep frying", nonetheless, but I suppose you could view it as boiling. I suspect that this fast, high heat, "deep frying" method contributes to the tender consistency of the meat in the end product even though it's well-done.

I've toyed with the idea of making stir fry in a slow cooker (sans the rice, which would be cooked separately) but have yet to try it. Slow cookers are my favorite way to cook when it comes to meat. Being someone who only eats meat well-done, a slow cooker is the best way to get decent meat and you don't even need expensive cuts.

In fact today I made a London broil cut of meat cooked in the slow cooker with cream of mushroom soup as the "gravy". IMHO, that's hard to beat with some mashed potatoes. Just got done eating it and I'm stuffed.
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Old December 26th, 2020 #5
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30 years ago I had food poisoning from a chink takeaway. I mentioned this in the past and the details had Garrett on his fainting couch.
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Old December 26th, 2020 #6
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Garrett eats the chinese in the foodcourt at the mall because it's cheap!
 
Old December 26th, 2020 #7
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30 years ago I had food poisoning from a chink takeaway. I mentioned this in the past and the details had Garrett on his fainting couch.
Ever think that it might have been lousy food that motivated me to "kill thousands of innocent men, women and children" as you accused me of in another thread you dago bitch?

I hate gook food.
 
Old December 26th, 2020 #8
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Garrett eats the chinese in the foodcourt at the mall because it's cheap!
Shut the fuck up before I pop you like a pimple

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Old December 27th, 2020 #9
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In fact today I made a London broil cut of meat cooked in the slow cooker with cream of mushroom soup as the "gravy". IMHO, that's hard to beat with some mashed potatoes. Just got done eating it and I'm stuffed.
I've used london broil cuts as meat for pot roast as well, and it comes out pretty good. It's a relatively cheap cut of meat too. I sear the meat in an iron skillet, salt and black pepper rub, and then make a gravy in the skillet out of dried onion soup mix, and caramelized onions. Crush up some fresh garlic, and stuff it inside of the meat in a few spots.

Slow cook it for a few hours, and then toss in the potatoes, carrots, and let it all cook till done. I got a dutch oven for stuff like this. I've also used canned french onion soup for the base. Talking like $10-$12 worth of food here that could easily feed 5 people. And you can use the leftovers the very next day to make beef stew. And freeze that into portions in a ziplock bags, and heat it up and eat it for awhile. Nothing goes to waste even if you got lots of leftovers. Beef stew heats up from frozen quite nicely. Some beef stew I made 2 months ago from a pot roast is what I ate for dinner today.

I've also taken a big chunk of pork butt and slow cooked it in a dutch oven for about 8hrs. You can take a fork, shred it up and make pulled pork BBQ sandwiches. You can freeze the leftovers. I've taken leftover pulled pork and made pork taco meat out of it. Season it and simmer it down just like you would with ground beef.

I don't know if it's because there's a bunch of kikes in my area or if Jethro is observing a strict kosher diet, or what, but most of the meat in the markdown sections at the grocery store is pork. Works for me, because pork is one of my favorite meats anyway. I see quality cuts of pork tenderloin with huge markdowns all the time. I'm talking like a $30 chunk of pork tenderloin marked down to $8. I can take that to the deli and ask them to slice it in 1" thick cuts, and I've got enough pork chops to feed 10 people, easily.
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Last edited by Crowe; December 27th, 2020 at 01:52 AM.
 
Old December 27th, 2020 #10
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Yes, I'm a big fan of pork, too. Only reason why I cooked a London broil the other night was because it was on sale but I don't usually buy beef.

Pork in a slow cooker is fantastic. Any cut of pork. Slow cookers make cheap cuts of meat edible.

Also bloneless pork rib on a grill is exquisite.
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Last edited by Larry the Raysiss; December 27th, 2020 at 11:18 AM.
 
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